If you’re planning on asking a loved one to be your Maid of Honor (or are the Maid of Honor), you may be wondering: Does the Maid of Honor Always Give a Wedding Speech?
Let’s tackle this below!
Does the Maid of Honor Always Give a Wedding Speech?
Wedding speeches are a common tradition that includes members of the wedding party, family and often the couple giving a 2-3 (ish) minute speech. But, who gives a speech, and do they always have to give a speech?
According to Emily Post, the Best Man offers the first toast (perhaps the only one), followed by the fathers (mothers may toast instead/as well). The Maid of Honor may toast, followed by the couple’s “thank you” toast (Emily Post “Emily Post’s Etiquette 18th Edition – Pg 649-650).
So, Does the Maid of Honor Have to Give a Speech?
Ultimately, it’s up to you. But, we’ll break down a few more specifics to consider whether you’re the bride or the Maid of Honor below.
If you’re the bride:
If you’re the bride trying to answer this question, consider answering the following two questions:
- Do you want the MOH (Maid of Honor) to give a speech?
- Does your MOH wish to give a speech?
If you want the MOH to give a speech:
You’ll want to ask your Maid of Honor how she feels about giving a speech. You can let her know that you’d love for her to give a speech, but it’s ultimately up to her.
If you don’t want the MOH to give a speech:
Whether you’re afraid of what she’ll say, don’t want speeches at all, or just want to keep them limited to a few people, talk to your Maid of Honor. Let her know you’ve decided to keep things simple, so she won’t have to give a speech. Consider telling her you want her to just focus on enjoying the reception without worrying about giving a speech.
If you’re the Maid of Honor:
If you’re the MOH trying to answer this question, consider answering the following two questions:
- Has the bride asked you to give a speech?
- Do you want to give a speech?
Has the bride asked?
If the bride has asked you to give a speech, you know where she stands. However, if you haven’t been asked, check with the bride. She may want you to give a speech and just assumed you knew, or she may not want you to give a speech, so she hasn’t asked.
Do you want to give a speech?
While speeches are common, they aren’t mandatory (Read my blog post on “Do I Have to Give a Wedding Speech?” for more!).
If you want to give a speech, check with the bride, and if you agree, you’ve got your green light to start writing and practicing.
But if you don’t want to give a speech, you, ultimately, don’t have to. But make sure you’re on the same page with the bride before the big day, so there’s no surprises or let downs.
Next steps: Maid of Honor Speeches
Does the Maid of Honor always give a wedding speech? The answer is no. It will come down to what the couple wants and what the Maid of Honor is comfortable doing.
If you have questions, please leave them in the comments below!